Polarization is exhausting, isn’t it? All over the world, there are the pro-masks and anti-masks, pro-lockdown and anti, never mind the extremes in our governments. We all have strong feelings about *something* but wouldn’t it be nice if we could find a way to just take a breath and calm down? Find a way to let the dust settle?

We are now entering a wormhole, as Stephanie refers to an eclipse passage, and many of us are familiar with this process of surrender as we move through an accelerated period of transformation. Yes, I know, 2020 has been one long transformation of sorts. But are we getting anywhere or are we still dividing, polarizing?

This wormhole delivers us to 2021 and with it, ourselves. Chaos continues but if you listen very carefully, you might hear something in the wind. Anticipation? Hope? Healing? Allow yourselves the time to go within and experience these wondrous energies that make their way into our lives throughout the coming months. Find them in spite of what you perceive “out there”. They exist within you, and as we make them tangible inside ourselves, so they will manifest without.

What happens when polarization reaches its furthest point? Does it spring back to the center and start over... or does it break free from the extreme tension and just slowly dissipate, fading away into the cautionary tales of the future?

I come back to a question I have asked many times over the last year: who are we? Who am I?

And so I am told:

Prepared or not, change comes for all beings. Some will resist, others will breathe a sigh of relief. Transformation is the greatest of all changes, a sacred endeavor, allowing you to access the deepest depth of your Be-ing. When the I Am presence calls, the soul must answer.

The caterpillar dies to become the butterfly. The seed dies to become the plant. All that is required is that each surrender to process, trusting that all will be well, that the soul knows the path forward. 

Ego may attempt to interfere but must be pressed aside. Only the soul may direct from here. As world events illustrate, ego misleads and misdirects. Your heart is the voice of your soul and must be heeded as you surrender to your greatest truth.  

(The following is from this week last year and seemed particularly timely so I am including it in this week’s offering.)

11/18/2019

I woke up this morning with the words “pay attention” reverberating in my head. As I made my way to the kitchen for coffee, the words continued. I fed the dogs, did some laundry, planned my day, and still I heard the words “pay attention”.

So I stopped. I sat down, got quiet and I listened to the world around me. I. Got. Quiet. I felt my heartbeat. I listened to my breath and I began to feel the rhythm of my body. Tight muscles began to relax and a sense of well being filled my body. I felt my breath slow and I began to settle back into my body with a sense of coming home.

Those who guide me tell me that those moments when we turn inward and pay attention help us connect not only with our inner selves, but also more deeply with Mother Earth and each other. We must learn to live consciously, paying attention in every moment. The need for this becoming extremely important, I am told. In my mind’s eye, I am shown a fishnet-like framework, with each of us as the points of connection, and this framework surrounds the earth.

And they tell me that our simple act of paying attention creates this framework. This simple? I asked incredulously. And with all the love with which they surround me, they replied resoundingly: Yes. Just this simple. It has always been thus. The inner world creates the outer world. But it must begin with paying attention to your own inner world.

We cannot forget that we are changing with the world, and that change must be supported and nourished. Pay attention to the thoughts you tell yourself, the decisions and choices you make. Reach out to others for support if you need it. Most of all, pay attention to that inner self with which you are blessed. I am told that we must be vigilant in this pursuit because it will become increasingly more important. Everyone I talk to is struggling in some way and it is important that we who can create a safe haven within for ourselves and for others. A global community is consciously arising and we must be members in good standing so that we may create a powerful foundation for all of us.

So I say to you Pay Attention. The single most important thing you can do for yourself every day is simply pay attention to your inner self. Allow yourself moments to reboot, to check in with yourself and see what you need. So go on, go sit down and just breathe.

Choices. What does peace look like? Are we allowed to be different and unique? Or must we all look alike, think alike and believe alike? If many of us don’t even know who we are individually, projecting our shadows, fears and hates hither and yon, how can we possibly decide who we are together? Many of us have lost relationships with people we care about these last four years. Do we want to continue to be separate, hating those who are not like *us*? Do we want to embrace unity and celebrate our diversity? Who are you? Who do you want to be remembered as? Do you stand for division or unity? If you met yourself face to face, what would you think? Say? Would you choose you?

While we here in the United States have survived the election, and have elected a man dedicated to unifying the nation, there is still an enormous amount of division nationally. That division “out there” is a reflection of what is inside each of us and it has never been more important than now, and in the next few years, that we each recognize, own and take responsibility for that within us that rejects/is frightened by/negates unity. We must embrace unity as our most sacred nature, knowing our divine heritage. That begins now, with each of us.

[The above is what I started writing for my column today and reflects thoughts that have been going through my mind this last week. As I wrote, I was aware of how exhausted and drained I felt and I thought it might help to write about it in my journal. What follows is that entry.]

11/8/2020.   I am exhausted. Drained. Emotionally spent. I expected some of this after a week of constant adrenaline pumping while I was endlessly watching tv, waiting for results to come in and then the absolute relief of hearing Joe Biden declared president-elect and Kamala Harris our next Vice President.

I am craving protein like a starving wolf. And when I say exhausted, I don’t mean a little tired. I mean that I am bone-deep weary from carrying so much these last four years. Living in a world that has appeared contradictory to everything I stand for and believe in was harder than I ever Imagined it would be. Every single day I had to firmly wrap myself in my deeply held spiritual beliefs, knowing I needed to hang on, to keep the faith, hold the light, keep going.

What we see “out there” is a projection from each of us. I know this, accept it and from the beginning, have taken it very personally. So much so that I felt I carried the burden, the karmic responsibility of all the hate and anger and fear I saw “out there”. And it was a very heavy burden indeed. The last four years have been excruciating emotionally, mentally and spiritually. My faith never wavered but I see now that I did not understand my own projection at all.

My job was not to carry responsibility for the actions, words and beliefs of others but to find it in myself. My focus, rather than inward, was on remaining strong in my forward-looking devotion to unity. I donated, I wrote, I attempted to educate others, I advocated, I took my spiritual beliefs to heart and I even grew as a human being.

What I did not see was a hidden place inside me that completely bought into the them vs. us mentality. I created my own polarization. As I sat here this morning, I realized the anger and fear I have carried has washed away. I have carried it like armor and a sword, hiding it fiercely behind righteousness, all these years. With their departure, I could see me again. And what I saw was that, behind all the armor and righteousness, I had taken pleasure in being on the side of right and in defending unity with pride.

Somewhere inside, I had felt more enlightened, more wise, more heart-centered than those who chose a man who represented hate and selfishness and lies. It was there all the time for me to see in his “alternative facts”: I had been hiding behind a mask of self-righteousness.

I have written endlessly about shadow work but missed this opportunity to own a portion of my own.

Wholeheartedly I believe in unity, and my spiritual beliefs are as strong as ever but I see me more clearly, and I recognize my part in this four-year tragedy. I will never agree with his policies and actions, but I see how I helped create and sustain a “them and us” world.

I am humbled and filled with gratitude at the opportunity to see behind my own personal curtain and to welcome home a shadow aspect I am not proud of but for which I am infinitely grateful. Dropping our figurative masks is never easy, and I am struggling a bit with self-judgement but I recognize this moment for the gift that it is.

Choices indeed.

If there is anything these last four years have taught us, it is that we are our own saviors.

~Heather Cox Richardson

I am attaching to all the good forces in the universe ❤️unity dignity hope.

~Sharon Carstedt Briton

You have travelled too fast over false ground;

Now your soul has come, to take you back...

~John O’Donahue

“His godfather nodded. “But it was compassionate to spare them. Life can be cruel, as you know. But it can also be kind. Filled with wonders. You need to remember that. You have your own choice to make, Armand. What’re you going to focus on? What’s unfair, or all the wonderful things that happen? Both are true, both are real. Both need to be accepted. But which carries more weight with you?” Stephen tapped the boy’s chest. “The terrible or the wonderful? The goodness or the cruelty? Your life will be decided by that choice.” 

~Excerpt From

All the Devils Are Here

Louise Penny

(Final note: No channeled guidance this week. All I can “hear” is their laughter. It is loving laughter, but laughter nonetheless...)

Deep Breath

We are in uncharted territory. A political quagmire, authoritarianism seemingly on the rise, uncontrolled climate change, job insecurity caused by an unbalanced economy, and a worldwide pandemic that shows no sign of mitigating - anyone of these would cause uncertainty and concern, but these days we inundated on all sides by all of these and more. And the United States faces an election this week unlike any other this country has seen before.

To say that we feel uncertain and off-center is a gross minimization of what so many are experiencing. As I look around me, it seems everyone is struggling to maintain - well, if not center, at least somewhere nearby.

When the shadow runs rampant, which we can see on the news or even just experience from people around us, fear takes over and the awareness of wholeness is lost. How do we survive divided? This is a good time to ask yourself what you stand for. To ask yourself who you are and if you stand for wholeness and unity or division. That choice decides the fate of all of us.

We all know by now that shadow work, seeking to examine and reclaim the hidden or rejected sides of ourselves, is a good thing. As we lovingly welcome back those parts of ourselves that we have deemed unlovable, we grow visibly into our inherent wholeness. There has never been a more perfect moment to embrace our wholeness than right now.

And so I am told:

Children of the One Mother Father God, the God of Union, at this watershed moment in time/space, we come to you with a message of hope. Your hearts are known by those who watch, guard and guide. Some will stay; some will depart. Some will incite; some will heal. Many will hold the Light higher and higher that all may see it and feel its healing power. Those who choose not to embrace the light have incarnated for the purpose of division, and that is a choice, a role that must be played out in this time/space. Those who listen to their Heartsong know that unity is who you are - who all are - and why you are here. This particular storyline must continue to play out by those who are engaged and have chosen to take part. Those of you who know who you are and your purpose of being the Light will continue to shine regardless of circumstance. As you have heard, it is always darkest before the dawn. Reflect upon this for a moment: The dawn is coming. 

And finally, some reminders from me:

1. Breathe. Oxygen clarifies, stabilizes and centers.

2. Utilize the Observer’s Perch. Embracing a higher perspective allows objectivity, balance and detachment which serves to replace fear and anxiety.

3. Self-care. Feed your heart and soul with that which gently nourishes: meditation, communion with others, prayer, being out in nature, and so on.

4. Body care. Love your body; after all, you chose it. Eat nutritious food, exercise, and rest.

5. Trust that all will be well.

6. Shadow work. Clean out the closet of your past, own projections, recognize and welcome home the rejected parts of yourself.

7. Learn to see yourself in others that you might know yourself better.

8. Find or create Community. Virtually!! Reach out to others when you need help or feel alone, or just want to laugh and enjoy the company of others.

9. What can you give or do for others?

10. Have faith that you are not alone on this path and that there is a higher purpose to all that occurs.

11. Embrace your heart and its unwavering message of truth.

12. Frequently throughout the day, take time to be grateful and particularly when you are down or spiraling.

13. Shine your Light. Shine it as brightly and completely as you can!

Let me also take a moment to express my profound gratitude to all of you who read my words and those who reach out to me. You expand my world in glorious ways and never let me forget that your brilliant lights are shining so powerfully all around this globe. I am blessed by your presence in my world

The news continues to disrupt and dismay, even to horrify, and yet, there seems to be a hint of hope in the air. Shift is occurring, quietly but steadily. What strikes me about this shift is that it feels solid, as its foundation is deep and strong. There is a power to it. A power that makes building anew an exciting proposition, rather than a daunting one.

For while our focus has been on rebuilding our nation and our world, it will, in fact, have to be created anew as institutions that have seemed solid are now cracked and exposed. We have seen powerful institutions that, while once designed to protect us, have unwittingly exposed serious flaws and pitfalls. Leaders worldwide seem to have lost their abilities to lead, instead falling into dysfunctional behaviors and temper tantrums.

Ugliness continues in simple human interactions as we go about our lives as best we can. Confrontations abound in public places. No one can agree on the best way to protect ourselves from Covid 19. Everything we see out there is tumultuous, chaotic and divided. And if we see it out there, what does that tell us about ourselves?

We are all cracking open and becoming exposed; the good, the bad, the ugly displayed for the world to see. Not everyone is acting out but each of us is experiencing stress-related behaviors, thoughts and emotions, all designed to break through the barriers we have erected to keep us “safe”. It is messy and often ugly but we are ripping the curtain away and seeing behind it to the truth of who we really are. The burden of carrying an increasingly heavy illusion of who and what we thought we were has become intolerable.

What do you see when you look in the mirror of the world these days? Do you recognize yourself in those you see out there? In your own behaviors, actions and thoughts?

What and who have your life choices made you?

We can no longer turn away from who we are and what we bring to the world. We can no longer allow our Shadows free rein to act out, as we see on display in the highest levels of our government.

We are Divine Beings having a human experience, and our consciousness, our deliberate awareness of who and what we are is what we came here to remember and BE. This is the hope of which I spoke in the beginning. A hint that many people are digging deeply, remembering and reconnecting with the scattered parts of themselves and allowing heart to lead the way. The election is just the next step. The real work of union is still coming and it will take all of us, working in unison, to create this beautiful new age. Walk forward knowing your light and heart will lead the way forward.

Let what you see out there remind you fully of the Divine Being created of Light and Love that you truly are. Only when we fully embrace who we are can we then build the world we want to see: a world that is inclusive and whole, built on the foundation that we are all One.

And so I am told:

Wholeness is not an act of accomplishment, it is merely and miraculously who you are. Every single particle of each being is whole. Parts that have been discarded or hidden away are not gone; they merely await your acceptance and welcome. Your heart is limitless and makes plenty of room to love the unlovable. Consciousness accords you the ability to embrace the parts you consider negative as merely mis-qualified attempts to hide fear from yourself. Consciousness is not something you must strive for; simply allow it to flourish. Each of you chose to be here now at this momentous moment and brought insight, awareness, and compassion to fully illuminate your life. Remember this. You were not sent helpless to a desert island. You came, fully prepared and ready, to change the world with your Light. This is not an ending. It is a Beginning.