Wormhole Part 2
I have never been a fan of those amusement park rides that tilt and spin you, turn you upside down and drop you. Mostly, that is because I get extremely motion sick, but also it has been because I have never liked not being in control of my body.
Well. We all know how the Universe feels about anyone thinking they are in control, right? Hysterical laughter and a “Here, watch this” as our lives are turned upside down.
The only response to that is to just leap off the cliff and prepare to fly.
This last weekend, almost all of my immediate family gathered together at my sister’s farm for a long weekend. My daughter and I joined them on Friday. 12 people under one roof.
Historically, our family, when gathered together, behaves like a reality show with all the accompanying drama and chaos. The great fun is equally matched with angry words and year long silence treatments.
My sisters and I fell apart twenty years ago when my dad passed away and our relationships have been rocky every since. I say this only so you can understand that I was really nervous about attending this gathering, the first in many, many years.
And I was acutely aware that his gathering was occurring during a wormhole. What could possibly go wrong??
Well, as it turned out nothing went wrong. That observer’s perch and all that hard work resulting in awakening that I have experienced under Stephanie’s tutelage these last many years served me well. I was able to stay out of all the crazy and just observe. I was able to stay in my own light and share it with those who needed a little extra love.
Best of all, I was able to see past the crazy to the hearts of these people who are my family, and it changed me. I wish I had been able to do this years ago but I am incredibly grateful I am able to now. Our family has never been adept at talking things through, and I saw a panoply of unhealed wounds being paraded in full visibility. And you know what? Despite the harsh words that have been spoken between us over the years, not one of those wounds had anything to do with me. At all. There was nothing I needed to fix or defend. I could just let my light fly and love on any and all of them.
And let me say, there was plenty of crazy. None of it was horrific or life altering, thankfully, but it showed me that my only job is just to hold the light, to maintain a safe container for this group of nuts that is my family. By and large, they are pretty awesome people who have wounds and words that have remained unspoken. That is their journey.
All my life I have looked for my purpose, hoping for something amazing. Turns out it was.
All I have to do is show up and shine my light and love. How amazing is that?!
Who knew that wormholes could deliver such a wonderful transformation? We always expect things to go off the rails. We forget that sometimes we need to be off the rail. We need to let go off control and just fly.
(Lest I forget that we are in a wormhole, I just looked up and found that the noise I have been hearing as I was immersed in writing was my puppy eating my morning yogurt. On the table.)